I mean I want to see

YOU walk through the airport and buy a pair of Dior sunglasses that you can afford and you feel like you have a bit of the magic.

You buy a bottle of Hermes perfume for your wife and you feel like you’ve a bit of the magic.

How does it happen?

Logos brand people: You declare you’re a member of a tribe that subscribes to that brand’s message by toting logos…essentially the dreams conjured up for you by the marketing department. Luxury-brand logos convey wealth, status, and chic.

You’ve been played by some of the savviest businessmen on the planet.

The man behind LVMH, Bernard Arnault, for instance, makes for an interesting read: he’s 100 per cent capitalist in a country that has snubbed capitalism: “For a European, I have a U.S. approach. That is, I face reality as it is and not as I would like it to be. I build for the long term.”

The luxury goods industry, says Arnault, “is the only area in which it is possible to make luxury margins”. This is the new luxury model he helped develop: enhance timelessness, jazz up the design, and advertise like crazy.

To refurbish an ailing LV, the management launched Vuitton ad campaigns that romanticised luxury travel, organised and sponsored antique car rallies such as the Vintage Equator Run in 1993 across Southeast Asia, and invited journalists on tours of the Asnieres workshop to write stories about how a Vuitton trunk was made.

It chose scruffy and Bohemian Marc Jacobs to help its ready-to-wear collections, which were critically lauded during fashion week and seen as a style bellwether for the industry. The clothes are produced in small quantities, sell for extremely high prices, and the line’s main function, it seems, is to garner headlines and dress up ads to sell leather goods.

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Analysts estimate that 20 per cent of all luxury goods are sold in Japan and another 30 per cent to Japanese travelling abroad. Today, approximately 40 per cent of all Japanese own a Vuitton product. They claim in market studies they buy luxury goods for a logical reason: durability.

In the 1960s and 1970s, the Japanese economy flourished, giving birth to a newly flush middle class that wanted to live a more ostentatious life. Grand homes or vast real estate holdings — generally the most blatant way to enjoy as well as exhibit one’s riches — was a near impossibility in the densely populated island-nation. Instead, the Japanese chose to show their wealth by dressing richly.

How Hawaii’s Kalakaua Avenue has turned into luxury brand temples.

And how this template has moved to places like Hong Kong. And Singapore.

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In Gucci, for instance, the “interlocking G” canvas material is very inexpensive to produce and has very low price points.

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Luxury began in China and has now returned there, for consumption as well as production. And it is marching onward to India and Russia. The potential customer base is phenomenal. In 2006, China officially had three hundred thousand millionaires, Russia eight-eight thousand, India seventy thousand. This is the century of emerging markets. It’s the beginning of the reawakening of cultures that have historically worshipped luxury and haven’t had it for so long.

* From Dana Thomas’ Deluxe.

Waving everybody off, Pulau Aur 2010. Image © Yvonne Koh

While I lie about nursing my foot for the whole two days. Image © Yvonne Koh

Coolie ferry. Image © Yvonne Koh

GOT a taste of what it was like for my grandparents who crossed over to Singapore in little rickety boats when I took the ferry to Aur over the weekend — having sliced open two toes and bleeding like a stuck pig during the journey Friday night.

While I don’t like injuries, I’m pretty fine with falling down and cutting myself. You just get up and try again. It’s just a little blood, and you likely won’t die. Just be more careful next time.

We’re reading on globalisation and the nation state in class, and I’m writing my book review on syariah law in Indonesia, and realising I’ve to read a dozen books to make sense of the book I’ve chose to write the review on. And — oh my, I’m such a geek — being ecstatic that I have the resources to read the dozen books just for one 1,000-word book review.

Starting that project with the elderly too…We all want the same thing, don’t we? Happy endings, harbours of our own. We’re all the same. How we spend emotion. How love makes fools of us all. What we’re willing to sacrifice for family. How change happens despite the tired old world. How we “save the world” a bit at a time.

The problem is I want to have it all. Am torn between doing a PhD and a law degree. I’m falling in love with academia all over again…the question is how to have it all: A fulfilling career, a good family life, travels and downtime. We’ll see.

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The idea of kinship ties being very central to SE Asian relationships, and obligation and statehood. I would like to do a genealogy of “Asian values” and what that means. Orphans, failed states, forced migrations, people on the periphery.

National Museum 2010. Image © Yvonne Koh

When I am an old woman I shall wear purple
With a red hat which doesn’t go, and doesn’t suit me.
And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves
And satin sandals, and say we’ve no money for butter.
I shall sit down on the pavement when I’m tired
And gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells
And run my stick along the public railings
And make up for the sobriety of my youth.
I shall go out in my slippers in the rain
And pick flowers in other people’s gardens
And learn to spit.

You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat
And eat three pounds of sausages at a go
Or only bread and pickle for a week
And hoard pens and pencils and beermats and things in boxes.

But now we must have clothes that keep us dry
And pay our rent and not swear in the street
And set a good example for the children.
We must have friends to dinner and read the papers.

But maybe I ought to practice a little now?
So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised
When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple.

– Jenny Joseph

HI ALL, this is some background to our project, which ties in with efforts to care for the so-called “weaker” members of our society. We are focusing on the elderly who may be poor, isolated or vulnerable, and getting them to share their stories with us. Some of the folks we deal with will be homebound elderly who have some health problems.

(Figures are taken from this speech.)

We have one of the fastest ageing populations in the world. Today, there are about 300,000 persons aged 65 years and above. In 20 years’ time, we will see a three-fold increase to about 900,00 — ie today, one in 12 Singaporeans are 65 years and above. By 2030, this will be 1 in 5.

That is why we are preparing for an ageing society and that’s why it is important and urgent to do so.

In 2000, the number of elderly aged 65 and above living alone was about 15,000. This increased to 22,000 in 2005. Living alone is the highest risk factor for social isolation. Preliminary results from an MCYS-commissioned study indicate that 26% of seniors who live alone have symptoms of depression compared to only 9% who live with their spouse or family. Further, 16% of seniors with weak social networks outside the household also show such symptoms as compared to only 8% who have strong social networks outside of the household.

Based on the survey findings, an estimated 35,000 older persons aged 60 and above live alone in 2009. Even if we do not consider the increase in singles and smaller families, this number is expected to rise further, to 61,000 in 2020 and 83,000 in 2030.

Our community can act to prevent social isolation of the elderly, and this is where our project comes in useful.

As younger volunteers, we can extend our empathy and expertise. Not all of us can commit to regular befriending, but we can help record the stories, nursery rhymes, memories and journeys of our older generations.

Pulau Aur 2010. Image © Yvonne Koh

NEVER pressurise friends who aren’t confident in the water to go diving. ALWAYS do equipment check before you set off. Always ask questions before you sign up with a dive shop, or you may as well be diving solo. Always make sure you can rig up your own equipment, check your own equipment, AND DO BUDDY CHECK. Make sure you practice hand signals with your buddy before you go down into the water. Once you’re certified, you HAVE TO KNOW HOW TO TAKE CARE OF YOUR BUDDY in an emergency.

Diving is not a walk in the park. Seriously. Really. Go watch National Geographic or go snorkelling if you’re not equipped to be a responsible diver…

In other words, a safe diving rant from your friendly nagger who sliced open her foot and couldn’t go on a single dive this trip. But REALLY. DIVE SAFE.

And this is one piece of priceless advice I heard from an experienced diver: Never dive with someone with a big ego.

Which means I have to try not to have a big ego…which also applies to all areas of life. Big egos = danger.

Image © Yvonne Koh

A (Pointing to SIA ad and preparing to go into autorant about the Singapore Girl): You see, this is precisely…(sexism, fantasy, etc etc)
B (noticing it’s an ad for Munich): This is a sign! You’ve to visit me in Germany!

SHOWING Katrin around Singapore — we’d covered so much, with NUS and Little India and Holland V and Geylang for durians and chilli crab at East Coast; I’m now taking a breather, doing some reading and preparing for my dive trip this weekend. Get a mesh bag, fins, pack the wetsuit and all…

:) Diving diving! Therapy under the sea.

Laos 2010. Image © Yvonne Koh

Laos 2010. Image © Yvonne Koh

At a temple in Tad Lo, Bolaven Plateau. Image © Yvonne Koh

Image © Yvonne Koh

Image © Yvonne Koh

Image © Yvonne Koh

Image © Yvonne Koh

NO PLASTIC surgeons here…

期待下一代生育 先给孩子快乐的家庭
妇科医生徐菁赤的生育之道

林弘谕 (2010-08-22)

徐菁赤医生的专项是高危妊娠。

徐医生双亲是退休华文教师，自小受传统价值观熏陶，对生养也有负担，认为这是人妻应尽的责任。

对新加坡人生育这一科“不及格”，徐医生说：“孩子必须在快乐的家庭里成长，充分感受父母与长辈的爱，往后他们结婚生育的概率就高一些，因为他们也期待另一种快乐的延伸。”

新加坡医疗集团妇科中心医务总监徐菁赤医生（38岁），入行超过12年，对妇科情有独钟。她说，妇科跟儿科不同，前者是迎接生命的喜悦，后者很多时候看到的是孩子的病痛与眼泪，普通科也常见老人和病痛者，多是不开心的事。

另外，内科医生只在诊所看病，外科医生就是“chop”——动手术，跟病人很难建立长期关系。妇科则是取两者之间的优点，在诊所看病外，也帮忙接生或动一些手术，医生和病人能建立更好的关系，尤其是看到新生命的降临，给产房里带来无限欢乐。

健康妇女也可能属高危妊娠

徐医生的专项为高危妊娠科（high-risk pregnancy），这个成立不久的妇科中心，也专为高龄产妇服务。

过去近12年，她都在竹脚妇幼医院当妇科医生，最近被新加坡医疗集团挖角，特别设立妇科中心，由她主导。她说：“公司特别为我在诊所里设立一个手术室，随时能给有需要的病人进行小手术，对病人和医生来说，这是最理想的工作环境。”上星期一，新加坡医疗集团开设第二家妇科中心，也由徐菁赤医生担任医务总监。

高龄产妇除了是高危妊娠群外，那些健康、第一次生产的妇女，也可能属于高危妊娠。徐医生指出，一些产妇因怀孕导致高血压，造成多个器官衰竭，包括肝脏、肾脏、脑部等，最后致命，不可忽视。

她看过一名高龄产妇，因子宫颈无力（Incompetent cervix）生出早产婴儿。这种病症因子宫颈“无痛性扩张”无法锁紧，使得羊膜脱出导致破水而流产。徐医生说：“通常，初期怀孕至9个月，子宫颈内口应保持紧实，只有在临盆阵痛时，才会松弛开张，这个病人怀第一胎时，不晓得自己有子宫颈无力的问题，胎儿在26个星期早产，患上大脑性麻痹（Cerebral Palsy）。她第二次怀孕时来看我，我们发现她有这个问题，为她进行子宫颈缝合术，最后成功生出健康宝宝，她最近也生了第三个健康婴儿。”

高龄产妇较安全的做法

年过35的高龄产妇，胎儿患上唐氏综合症的概率偏高。过去，在接受妇科检查时，会进行抽羊水检测，但是每300个检测中，1个面对流产的危险。“也就是说，高龄产妇可能因做抽羊水检测，意外失去一个正常的胎儿。”另一方面，年龄低于35岁的产妇或年轻产妇，较少做这项检测，因此造成这个年龄层的产妇，生出较多的唐氏综合征婴孩。每100个这类病儿中，80个的母亲生产时，年龄都低于35岁。

她说：“现在，我们为各年龄层怀孕第一期的产妇做体检时，进行超声波扫描，同时检查她们颈项皮肤的厚度，鼻骨和血液检测，确定胎儿患上唐氏综合征的概率有多少，这是较安全的做法。”

高龄产妇怀孕期间，高血压和糖尿病是两个常见的问题。通常，在怀孕约7个月后，产妇才出现糖尿病现象，就得配合饮食调理。怀孕后期，如果糖尿病控制失当，胎儿可能面对死亡的危险。“孕妇应定时进餐，每次小量，确保血糖不会忽然升高，以稳定病况。”

糖尿病患者如果想怀孕，必须先停止口服药物，才开始计划怀孕，否则生出心脏有孔等疾病的婴儿概率很高。那些糖尿病患者意外怀孕，医生会进行详细的扫描，看胎儿是否不正常，再作打算。

徐医生说，一些高龄产妇因年龄关系，可能已有其他疾病问题，例如肾脏功能不良，一旦怀孕后，肾脏病可能变糟，最后增加患者高血压的概率。

孪生胎儿属高危妊娠

徐医生指出，一个人对高龄产妇常有的错误印象。“一些病人跟我说，自己年龄已经很大，担心自然分娩时没力气把孩子挤推出来，因此选择剖腹生产。其实，只要是健康的产妇，即使高龄，我都建议她们自然分娩。我知道病人中，年龄最大的是43岁，仍能生出健康孩子。”她的病人来自美国、瑞典、越南、蒙古、中国、新加坡等，包括不孕者。

另一个怀孕误解，认为一次过生两个的孪生胎儿最好。她指出这是属于高危妊娠群，生出早产儿的概率偏高。一些孪生是从两个卵子而来，有些从卵子一分为二，共同从一个胎盘吸取养分，后者每两个星期得给妇科医生复诊，确保胎儿发育正常。

胎盘的问题

徐医生特别指出，生产时，附着在子宫壁上的胎盘会随着婴儿出世而排出体外。“但是，一些病人的胎盘却生长在子宫壁内与外，当生产时，一部分胎盘会排出，另外一部分滞留在子宫里，生产时会造成大量出血。有些的胎盘则从子宫外延伸生长到其他器官，如膀胱等，好像癌细胞一样扩散。当出现这种情况，医生会让剩余胎盘保留在产妇体内，希望经过一段时间，胎盘被身体吸收而变小。但是，如果出现体内出血，医生就会动手术切除病人的子宫，这也可能对其他器官造成损伤。”

临床经验丰富的徐医生说，剖腹生产者如果再怀孕的话，出现胎盘在子宫外生长的概率较高，尤其是在剖腹愈合的疤痕上，这常被人忽略。医生必须通过超声波扫描，确定胎盘是否正常。她举一个病例，这个病人剖腹生产两个孩子，怀第三胎时，出现胎盘在子宫外靠近剖腹疤痕的地方，甚至也生长到膀胱部位，最后出现大量出血，她为病人切除子宫，保住生命。

问她西医对胎盘的药用价值有什么看法？

她笑说，西医不鼓励人们吃胎盘，它纯粹是蛋白质。很多年前，医院收集众多产妇的胎盘后，转卖给厂商制造化妆品，但后来担心感染爱之病病毒和B型肝炎等疾病，停止这类交易。
不是回家就翻查孩子课业的妈妈

坐在眼前的徐菁赤医生，漂亮，充满女性的柔美，说话轻声细语。但她自认是个好动的人，小学毕业，就取得跆拳道黑带。

她打趣说：“原本是要用这个吓唬一下丈夫，没料到他也是跆拳道黑带高手，我们的志趣相投。”母亲要她学弹钢琴，她学跆拳道；要她学芭蕾舞，她转去学游泳。

她的双亲是退休华文教师，自小受到华人传统思想与价值观的熏陶，重视家庭，对生养孩子也有负担，认为这是为人妻所应尽的责任。

当年，父母受到“两个就好”的生育政策影响，徐医生原本也想生两个，基于喜欢孩子，后来又多生一个。三个儿子分别是10岁、8岁、5岁，丈夫是律师。“三个很多了，不能再生，否则就无法给他们quality time（有素质的时间）。”如果孩子有课外安排的访游活动，她也会请假跟随，陪孩子一起游玩。

采访隔天，记者有问题致电给她，她正好拿半天假，要跟孩子去野餐。她说，她都尽量从密集的工作表中抽出时间，与孩子培养亲子关系。

一般上，她的工作是早上为病人动手术，之后在诊所看病，尽量在下午五六点下班，跟孩子相聚，这也是她转到私人医疗界服务的原因之一。

全家到齐后才能动筷

徐医生毕业自南洋女中，在华中初级学院认识现在的丈夫。丈夫喜欢看电影，每个周末都带孩子看戏。对于孩子的教养，她秉承华人的传统用餐礼仪，一定要全家到齐后才能动筷，而且孩子必须长幼有序地叫长辈吃饭，这方面的教养她很坚持，对女佣也须以礼相待。“反倒是读书，我没给孩子太多压力。我不是那种一回家就翻查孩子课业的母亲，而是告诉他们，应该在我们下班前先完成功课，那么我们回家后就能享受天伦。”

问医生进入医学院，是否得拥有一张每科特优的漂亮成绩单？

她说：“成绩固然重要，但是面试成果也是被录取的考量因素。新加坡学生非常聪明，晓得如何‘击败体制’，在学业上考取特优成绩。一些顶尖的初级学院，甚至教导学生在申请进入大学医学院的面试时，如何应对，如何解答问题，如何得分。”

虽然，现在医学院的入学保持各科特优的高标准，但是实习医生的工作流程已改善很多。“我记得第一天当实习医生时，从早上8点忙足24小时，为了方便工作，我还特别挑一双舒适的鞋子来穿，工作忙进忙出，跑上跑下，最后发现一双脚湿嗒嗒的，原来是破皮流血，我贴上药布，继续工作。我不感觉疼痛，一直到下班后，回到家里，两只脚像废了一样！”

让另一种快乐延伸

最近，李光耀资政说：生儿育女这一科，新加坡人“不及格”！徐菁赤医生说，新加坡人花太多时间在工作的追求上，即使其他国家，也面对同样问题。

她说：“当你对工作表现满意后，再想到结婚，甚至生育，到时你已力不从心了。我身边有很多优秀的同事和朋友，都无法找到适合的对象。

“我认为孩子必须在一个快乐的家庭里成长，充分感受父母与长辈的爱，那么往后结婚、生育的概率就高一些，因为他们也期待另一种快乐的延伸。”

SOMETIMES I have to tell myself to have patience when faced with the smugness of some expats who live off the fat of a country they have a less-than-thinly disguised contempt for.

Would love to have a “gift” kit to present to them consisting of fibre chewable, laxative and lubricant. In fact, that’s what I think I’ll do.

Feeding time for cat at Pasir Ris toilet C4/5. Note drainage system courtesy of MEWR. Image © Yvonne Koh

Mewr. Image © Yvonne Koh

Lazing around after being fed. Image © Yvonne Koh

Cat at Toilet C2. Image © Yvonne Koh

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On A’s plan for a tour company.

B: You can link up with all the Oxford toffs.
A: I went to a poor college. Our most famous alum is Aung San Suu Kyi. And she’s under house arrest.

Greenery at Pasir Ris. Image © Yvonne Koh

Vertical garden at Hort Park. Image © Yvonne Koh

In case we needed ambulances. Image © Yvonne Koh

Wildlife. We also had to inch past monkeys with baby monkeys on the treetop walk. Image © Yvonne Koh

OUT hiking Southern Ridges and Kent Ridge with WL, DS, MG. ‘Twas a nice leisurely walk in which WL pointed out Alkaff Mansions, The World’s Best Toilet, and we saw monkeys and monitor lizards and took a bus from ulu nowhere back to Buona Vista. Good to get some fresh air, and now it’s back to chao mugging. I don’t know ANYTHING much about SE Asia, so it’s great to take this programme.

Life’s wonderful. :) Good discussions in class, making new friends and keeping in touch with the people who really matter.

*

…British colonial Malaya, where nineteenth century patterns of labour recruitment, deployment and control and subsequent policies towards agriculture, administration, language and education, and religion discouraged the assimilation and intermarriage of Chinese immigrants into Malay society and encouraged instead the hardening of Chinese and Malay identities. Given the sheer size of the Chinese population, the perceived backwardness of the Malay peasantry and aristocracy, and the racialist logic of the British colonial state, paternalistic policies were also adopted with the avowed aim of “protecting” the rights of the “native” population from “alien” (that is, Chinese, but not European) predators.¹

To do:

SE 4229 Review article, due Sept 17.
SE 5151 Reflection essay, due Sept 30.
Bahasa learning.
Reading up on country histories of SEA: eg Indonesia, Philippines, Thailand.

*

A: Do either you of you do artsy things?
B: C used to play the piano. But he stopped after meeting me. I’m like his anti-muse.

A (on political dissession): They could put me on Sentosa.
B: And you’ll be forced to ride the roller coasters again and again.

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Red Star@Chin Swee…Keeping it real. Image © Yvonne Koh

Preparing the groats for serfs like me. Image © Yvonne Koh

The art of letting people let you take photos of them is one of flattery. “Shuai ge!” Image © Yvonne Koh

Shuai ge! Image © Yvonne Koh

Har gao siew mai lo mai gai. Image © Yvonne Koh

Check out the lanterns and retro decor. Image © Yvonne Koh

*

WALKED out of Girl With The Dragon Tattoo halfway through the scene with the psycho guardian. I cannot take violence/rape of any kind well, even if it’s on screen. This is why I never watch horror movies. Am quite intrigued by the series, though, may see if I can get hold of second-hand copies of the book.

MAG Lao PDR. Image © Yvonne Koh — although it’s a photo of photos. Nice. :P

I’LL be going to Laos next year and am planning a community service project, am looking to work with MAG and Big Brother Mouse and other organisations. Probably heading over in December next year…Drop me a note if you want to come along.

Cat in Tiong Bahru. Image © Yvonne Koh

Oda a la pantera negra

Hace treinta y un años,
no lo olvido,
en Singapore, la lluvia
caliente como sangre
caía
sobre
antiguos muros blancos
carcomidos
por la humedad que en ellos
dejó besos leprosos.
La multitud oscura
relucía
de pronto en un relámpago
los dientes
o los ojos
y el sol de hierro arriba
como
lanza implacable.
Vagué por las calles inundadas
betel, las nueces rojas
elevándose
sobre
camas de hojas fragantes,
y el fruto Dorian
pudriéndose en la siesta bochornosa.
De pronto estuve
frente a una mirada,
desde una jaula
en medio de la calle
dos círculos
de frío,
dos imanes,
dos electricidades enemigas,
dos ojos
que entraron en los míos
clavándome
a la tierra
y a la pared leprosa.
Vi entonces
el cuerpo que ondulaba
y era
sombra de terciopelo,
elástica pureza,
noche pura.
Bajo la negra piel
espolvoreados
apenas la irisaban
no supe bien
si rombos de topacio
o hexágonos de oro
que se traslucían
cuando
la presencia
delgada
se movía.
La pantera
pensando
y palpitando
era
una
reina
salvaje
en un cajón
en medio
de la calle
miserable.

Ode to the Black Panther

It happened 31 years ago,
I can’t forget it,
in Singapore, the rain
falling
hot like blood
on the ancient white walls
half-eaten by the dampness
that left
leprous kisses on them.
The dark crowd
suddenly glowed
in a flash of lightning,
baring teeth
or eyes
and the steel-like sun
was an implacable sword
in the sky.

I stumbled through flooded streets,
the red Betel nuts
lifting themselves
above
the beds of fragrant leaves
and the Dorian fruit
rotted away
in the sultry afternoon.

All of a sudden
I faced a stare
coming out of a cage
in the middle of a street,
two icy circles,
two magnets,
two enemy currents,
two eyes
that penetrated my eyes
and nailed me to the earth
and to the leprous wall.

I then saw
the rippling body
and it was
a trace of velvet
flexing perfectly,
darkest night.

Under her black fur
brushed with dust
flashed topaz rhombuses,
or gold hexagons—
I’m not sure which—!
whenever her thin presence moved.

The thinking
throbbing
panther
was
only
a
savage
queen
in a box
in the middle
of a filthy street.
Out of the jungle
far away from lies,
the stolen spaces,
the bittersweet odor
of humans
and their dust-filled houses
she alone
expressed
through her gem-like
eyes
her disgust,
her burning hatred,
and those eyes
were
two
unbreakable
seals
that closed
until
eternity
a door to the wilderness.

She paced back and forth
like fire and like smoke,
and when she closed her eyes
she became invisible
distant unembraceable night.

[Translated from the Spanish by David Unger]

Pablo Neruda (1904-1973) was awarded the Nobel Prize for literature in 1971.

David Unger is a prize-winning translator, novelist, and poet. His novel Life in the Damn Tropics was published in 2002 by Syracuse University Press.

Also see Rilke:

Der Panther

Im Jardin des Plantes, Paris

Sein Blick ist von Vorübergehen der Stäbe
so müd geworden, daß er nichts mehr hält.
Ihm ist, als ob es tausend Stäbe gäbe
und hinter tausend Stäben keine Welt.

Der weiche Gang geschmeidig starker Schritte,
der sich im allerkleinsten Kreise dreht,
ist wie ein Tanz von Kraft um eine Mitte,
in der betäubt ein großer Wille steht.

Nur manchmal schiebt der Vorhang der Pupille
sich lautlos auf—. Dann geht ein Bild hinein,
geht durch der Glieder angespannte Stille—
und hört im Herzen auf zu sein.

A: X has to come up with “Green tip of the week”.
B: Keep all your vitagen bottles and start an ant farm.
A: Start composting. In your HDB flat. You can sell the worms. For a profit!

C: It’s also about learning new skill sets…
B: Like negotiating.
C: Yes. It’s like: “Don’t mess with me. Uncle.” I came back after a dozen years in London with this accent and hold meetings with the architects and contractors and while the architects are fine, the contractors are like “Who the hell is this? Why do I have to respect her?”
B: You can try taking them out to karaoke.

B: If there’s one thing worse than a crazy cat lady it’s a crazy catless lady. I had to go around the carpark trying to find the scared kittens to feed. “Mew! Mew! Mew!”

A: XX showed us this beautiful apartment with a view of the harbour. “This is God’s gift to me.”
B: What about: “This is capitalism’s gift to me”?
A: Hey I’m not complaining. I had abalone.
B: That is God’s gift to you.
B: It shows you’re part of the tribe.
A: Yeah. At least it wasn’t: “Here, have a prawn head.”

Yellow flower, photoshopped for effect. Image © Yvonne Koh

The cat I’ll feed. Image © Yvonne Koh

 

THIS is why I should get an SLR and take courses: My framing of pictures is okay, but I can’t focus properly…need a good lens. I’ve always thought I didn’t need to and it’s just men and their equipment (My lens is bigger than yours! No! Mine is bigger!) but it’s true that I should fork out for a better camera if I want to freelance. It *is* an investment.

In other news, I’ve turned into the crazy cat lady in the park…the cat above is one of the three half-growns/kittens I’ll be feeding tomorrow, as a new lady friend I met is going up to Malaysia for National Day weekend and doesn’t want the kittens to suffer. My new friend above has unhealthy fur, though he’s alert and has staked out a prime location on a bridge where people fish.

No men this weekend, just hanging out with the old girls…a birthday celebration, a house party, reading, writing letters (hi Samiksha!!) and doing homework.

SOME people log down turtles and animals during their dives. I log down my paranoid questions, and had them answered by CS from V3 Aquatic Club.

A) How do I vomit underwater?

Try not to. The gag reflex is totally different underwater and you might end up choking on your own vomit. Not a very glamorous way to go.

It’s also possible to swallow your saliva if you feel like your mouth is too dry. Just try not to vomit.

If you *have* to vomit, vomit into your regulator. Do *not* take your regulator out of your mouth — always have air ready at your fingertips.

A ii) What should I eat before diving?

Just eat bread with kaya for breakfast, and a banana or a muesli bar. Don’t gorge on the oily stuff.

Also remember to hydrate: that is, drink lots of water, to help avoid cramping.

B) Are split fins any good?

CS’s advice is not to buy them as most diving accidents happen on the surface and split fins are very bad for movement on the surface. He’s trained in physics, so the physics of it mean that you have to flip more (albeit gently) to propel yourself forward, while with regular fins the right technique mean you propel yourself forward with fewer kicks.

His recommendation is the Mares Avantis Quattro. I would buy them in bright colours — one of the ways to attract attention at the surface is to wave your fluorescent orange/yellow/pink fin around if you don’t have a sausage.

C) Am I really an “advanced” open water diver after just 10 dives?

No, you’re not. It’s not the number of dives you’ve logged that matter, but your skills development.

Commercial outfits have to pay the rent, and they feel the pressure by PADI certification, so even NAUI and SSI and others tend to “churn out” divers without really paying attention to skills. It depends largely on your instructor, but I prefer the club system. I’m crossing over from a commercial SSI outfit to club BSAC training because of safety issues.

I also don’t really trust commercial outfits that can’t tell me their evacuation procedures in case of propeller accidents or decompression sickness.

D) Do I need to remember how to set up my own gear before I go diving?

Please learn to set up your own gear instead of depending on live-on-board/resort staff. When you’re below water, your air delivery system is your *life*. Make sure you know how to gear up with your octopus, make sure your octopus isn’t dragging when you dive, and learn how to deploy sausages etc.

Check *everything* before you go down. Take charge of your own safety. Scuba diving is no walk in the park.

Also remember to surface when the gauge hits 50 bar and not below. Sometimes there are errors in calibration and you really don’t want to be out of air. You also need some air in case of surface conditions, such as storms when you don’t want to be drinking water.

D) Do I need to read dive tables? Can’t I rely on computers and the dive master?

Dive computers fail. Some dive masters push too hard to “show” their charges more exotic things. *Yes*, you need to know how to read dive tables. Don’t jump in blindly expecting to follow people. Don’t expect your partner to take care of you. Take charge of your own safety!

Orange sky. Image © Yvonne Koh

FORGIVENESS and healing, that’s what’s happened. My heart was like Hamburg a few years after the bombings: there was rebuilding and prosperity, but the craters were still visible. It was a series of coincidences that brought me to where I am now — there *is* redemption, we don’t stay damaged forever.

Am still wondering about the way forward: Does the world really need another lawyer, or should I write? Or is there a way to balance teaching, and writing, and lawyering? Or should I be working towards a PhD in law eventually? I don’t know. And life has thrown curveballs aplenty my way: I’d wanted to go back to England to do a Master’s in literature but here I am, here I stayed and everything has changed. I fell in love with SE Asia as I backpacked around the region.

We’re lucky here in Singapore. Singapore was a Third World country in the 1960s with a GNP per capita or less than US$320. Infrastructure was poor, capital was scarce, there was hardly any foreign investment, and the few industries that were present produced goods primarily for domestic consumption. Large-scale unemployment and labour unrest awaited Britain’s military withdrawal from Singapore by the end of 1971, which would deprive the island of about 40 per cent of its gross domestic product. Creating jobs was the priority, which demanded attracting labour-intensive industries and the creation of a convival environment for industrial development.

In 1960, Finance Minister Goh Keng Swee asked a UN Industrial Survey Mission to visit Singapore. The mission was led by a Dutch economist, Albert Winsemius, who presented a ten-year development plan to turn SG from a port dependent on entrepot trade to a manufacturing and industrial centre.¹

The first generation of leaders had vision and guts, and a never-say-die spirit…a love for the country that would not let them go. In my travels I’ve gone to villages where people had to walk for an hour to get the basics like clean drinking water…I’ve had friends whose families were Vietnamese boat people. Singaporeans like to complain a lot, but there’s so much that we take for granted. Well, maybe we feel that we’re in comfortable shackles — but what can we do to change things? People complain too much, and quit too soon.

Proverbs 11:9 An hypocrite with his mouth destroyeth his neighbour: but through knowledge shall the just be delivered.

I know I felt uncomfortable with the double standards we have here: the hectoring and lecturing and determination to break the opposition. There’s much about the harshness of the beancounters in government that makes me aggrieved. But I am glad I’ve been given the time and opportunities to explore the region.

Proverbs 12:3 A man shall not be established by wickedness: but the root of the righteous shall not be moved.

But the foundations we have are sound, and I am optimistic about the future.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

One of my favourite songs… © Vienna Teng. I want to buy the album but it’s $40! Sigh.

THERAPEUTIC session with CS today. Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me. No point spending all that emotion on various people who are nice to you only when they see you’re useful to them, or what schools you’ve gone to, or what social connections you have, or how they can use you in their “professional survivor” capacity.

Interesting talk about army, reservist, and pretty talkers. Also about licensing for coaches. Ugly, ugly behaviour by various folk. I think I’m learning enough not to be taken in by sales pitches and suffer from “buyer’s remorse”. I’ve had enough of childishness and pranks. There’s no point indulging manipulation with an emotional response. “If I say nasty things to you, I will seem more aggressive and stronger and maybe you will back down.” I see through all of these silly games. & I can play them as well as you can in the professional capacity, which is why I think law would be a good choice for me to indulge this adverserial side of me.

I know D isn’t without flaws…just as I know I’m terribly human as well. But there are some things that are acceptable, and some that absolutely aren’t. Anybody who shows needless aggression towards me or my friends is totally unacceptable. Full stop. I can do much better for myself in the dating “market”, or remain an “old maid”. You can take your fancy accent and mean-spirited comments elsewhere, thank you very much.

The best way to judge character is to give this person a bit of power and see how she runs with it. There are those who kiss up and kick down. Having seen enough of them in my personal and professional capacity, I’m instinctively attuned to how they work and I avoid them at all costs. There are some people who are nice to me now not because of who I am, but because I know this or that other person, or because I could potentially “harm” them, or because I know enough to be a major pain in the arse for them. Some things, I know, are better kept in the realm of thought. I don’t need to say exactly what I think of you, but bless your little heart, what I think of you is not pleasant.

Some people make my blood pressure go down, some people make my blood pressure go up. Common sense tells me I should spend more time with the people who make my blood pressure go down. Absence doesn’t make the heart grow fonder, actually. It’s bad for my mental health to cope with mean people who backpedal. I detest meanness in people, those who are purposely hurtful and sarcastic. D has the good sense to take the mickey out of others without ever carrying it so far as to be hurtful.

I’m really not suited to work in a bureaucracy: It’s very bad for my blood pressure. I’ve had enough of dealing with places where the rot is endemic and whole limbs need to be chopped off. The aim is to eventually have my own business. Qualify as a professional, and then set up my own business. Right now it’s looking like a small family/employment/medical malpractice law firm. Even teaching…being an academic means I’ll be left to the vagaries of departmental politics and deal with various petty bureaucrats. If only there’s a way to implement the “No Asshole” rule effectively: This lies in the realm of fantasy, though. I can only hope that there is such a thing as karma.

*

To do:

- Learn Excel properly, sigh, sigh, sigh, sigh, sigh. Sigh again.

SO I was with D yesterday after a gorging session down Katong and Joo Chiat (328 laksa, Awfully Chocolate, Fei Fei Wantan Mee) and we ended the session at Eunos MRT, and heard Richard Marx’s Right Here Waiting over the broadcast system…

A: Perhaps this is to prevent people from suicide.
B: Those signs are not enough.
A: I don’t know. If I have to listen to sappy muzak day in day out I’ll jump.
A: Or maybe this is for the fun of the station controllers. They look at all the appalled faces of the commuters and laugh.

I actually kind of like the song, though, in *very* small doses.

Righto. Time to decide which hobbies I can pare down on and which ones to develop. My schedule’s packed to the gills. Calligraphy (guiltily skipping lessons). Diving and swimming. Chess (down the drain). Writing. Photography (asked about SLR courses). If only there were more hours in a day.

I’ve a huge capacity to burn myself out.

SIN city! Image © here

MAYBE I’ll go on a solitary sampling tour of all the ice-cream brands in the neighbourhood mamak shop. I think Magnum is overpriced and not yummy. I’d rather pay for Haagen Dasz (sp?) green tea ice cream actually, but sometimes it’s fun to just eat trash.

Didn’t sleep enough, as usual, and am self-medicating with sugar! Hey it’s the weekend and I can do exactly as I please, which is to lie around, eat junk food, and snipe. Maybe embark on some hysterical moral panic act. Try to see how I can put my grubby paws on other people’s money. Maybe — argggggg even read something in Bahasa. Sigh. Work! Work! I don’t want to work. We should just sit around on the beach under the coconut tree and eat coconuts and grow fat.

*

YES, I’m feeling snipey today, so let’s jump onto one of my favourite hobby horses, GAMBLING. I’ve some statistics here.

Firstly, from One Hope Centre, which helps gambling addicts and helps them on the path to recovery. (I’m ambivalent about it being a church group, but so far it’s the best non-profit I know of other than Credit Counselling that helps gambling addicts.)

The info below has been collected by an anonymous volunteer:

One Hope Centre support groups are large, numbering anywhere between 30 to 60 participants. Among One Hope clients, 35% are aged 35-44, 35% are aged 45-54, 90% are married, 90% are Chinese (YES, all the stereotypes are TRUE), and 35% are Buddhist. According to Reverend Tan, gamblers think they can control their emotions, and also believe they can control and recoup their losses. Problem gamblers can’t forgive themselves for their losses, and they become detached from society. Each compulsive gambler, according to the group, can also adversely affect the lives of somewhere between 10 and 20 relatives, friends, and business associates around him.

Many people here claim to use gambling for stress relief, leisure or (gasp) “family time”. As an example, Reverend Tan cited an MCYS 2008 survey which revealed that 50% of the respondents viewed gambling as a leisure activity, while another four in 10 undergrad students gamble. In addition, a similar SMU survey found that three youths out of 100 gamble, while the National Council on Problem Gambling reported that calls to their hotline have doubled since Resort World Sentosa opened its doors. When another casino theme-parm opened in April 2010, gamblers started using the excuse of “whole family entertainment” to pay a visit, throwing family members at the theme park and going into the casino themselves. “We are living in a world of gambling,” said the reverend, “and no one is immune from becoming a gambling addict when given the right opportunity.” He quoted Michael Franzsee, noting that “more lives are destroyed by gambling than by drugs and alcohol combined”.

(Note: This can also take the form of STOCK MARKET GAMBLING, or “land banking” or whatever, all you idiots who “invest” without really knowing WTF you’re doing.)

In Singapore, there’s the case of Simon Lee, a problem gambler who killed his family (a wife and two children) in March 2005. In another case, a Singapore businessman lost $6 million and was reduced to driving a taxi for a living. The reverend also pointed out that gamblers often get into heavy debt and borrow from illegal loansharks, who come knocking for payment. When gamblers can’t pay, they often want to kill themselves, thinking that they can then relieve the family of these problems. When callers phone One Hope, they are already at their wit’s end, and One Hope becomes their last hope.

While IMH maintains that gambling is a “problem of the brain” (WAKE UP, doctors!!), Reverend Tan claims it is a “heart problem” — greed. He says that strong family support is the key to recovery for problem gamblers. One Hope views its programme as a “family package treatment”, inviting family members to participate in the gambler’s recovery and restore the broken relationships. Otherwise, given the opportunity, a gambler can easily fall back into addiction.

Credit Counselling Singapore assists consumers in recovering from serious debt problems by providing general credit management information, credit counselling and debt management. While One Hope helps clients with emotional issues and illegal loansharks,
CCS deals strictly with debt management and legal loansharks.
CCS’s typical client is 39 years old, earns $2,700 a month, has about seven creditors, and owes $71,000 in debt. About 66% of clients are married, with 49% holding an A-level cert or above and 46% staying in a five-room flat or larger.
CCS charges $30 for a counselling session and $100 for its Debt Management Programme. These charges, it says, are levied so that the client will not take its services for granted and will be more committed to the programme.

Volunteers from
CCS started counselling debtors in 2005. Clients fall into four categories: a “hard luck” client suffers from an unexpected crisis, such as retrenchment or medical bills. The second category is the “spender”, where a client who earns $3,000 a month can actually spend over $5,000, using the $2,000 from credit lines. Men in this category typically make a few big purchases, such as a house or a car, while women typically make several small purchases that accumulate into big debts. For example, they might argue that it’s cheaper to “buy two, get one free”, which actually leads to more spending (YES: WAKE UP when you read those fancy credit card brochures for cosmetics + other “cute” items!) A third category is “muddle-headed” client, who borrows from the banks to lend the money to friends and family. For example, many people lost jobs last year and borrowed money to start their own companies. As the crisis worsened, many new ventures failed, leaving clients unable to repay their loans. Finally, the fourth category is the “punter” clients, who plays the stock markets or gambles on lotteries, soccer games or horse racing.

For someone to repay $71,000 in debt, the
CCS counsellor said that it would take 26 — yes, 26!!! — years of the client not buying anything to eat or drink. Troubled debtors rarely approach
CCS directly — more often than not, it’s a concerned family member who seeks resolution to the family debt.

With Marina Bay Sands Resorts Casino, the Casino will definitely want to recoup the $7.5 billion (I think) they sank into building this “theme park”. Let’s see where the money actually comes from.